she made me
Written by Samantha Hsiung, Grade 10
Photo by Katherine Chui
when i am six, Waipo¹ scolds
me for crying over a boy that
does not like me back.
she tells me that i don’t need a boy,
that i need a 男人 (nán rén)².
when i am nine, Waipo drags
me into the kitchen to fold dumplings.
she chisels a slice of dough into
a small and large circle,
loudly whispering that
my body is the same:
it can be whatever shape and size
i want it to be.
i (satisfyingly) smile as we toss the
irregularly-shaped dumplings into the
porcelain pot.
when i am twelve, Waipo brings
me to the river to breaststroke.
i am taught to cup my hands (in prayer)
and stretch out my arms until they
fill the wingspan of the sky.
Waipo (along with God) watches me practice until the
sky wanes, telling me to 不要放棄 (bú yào fàng qì)³.
i spend four hours in the river.
i am fifteen.
Waipo whines that
she is 孤獨 (gū dú)⁴,
that she is 老 (lǎo)⁵,
that she wants to give up.
i hush her and whisper that
she is loved,
that she is beautiful,
that she is strong.
___________________________________________________
¹ grandmother
² man
³ Don’t give up
⁴ lonely
⁵ old